We have to stop the Plain Dealer

I'm not really sure what's going on over there, but I don't like it.

First Branson Wright made up a Wade-Bosh-LeBron to the Knicks scenario. And when I say made up, I really mean that. Made. Up. Maybe Wright was sick of getting his ass handed to him by Brian Windhorst of the Akron Beacon Journal (BW is to the Cavs what Ed Werder is to the Cowboys), I dunno. But that was terrible.

Then, for no reason, Bill Livingston took a shot at Troy Smith for doing something bad (elbowing someone during a basketball game? For shame Troy Smith) as a junior in high school. Was it newsworthy? No. It was Bowling Green week and Livingston needed something to write about. He did however praise Smith this past week after that little Heisman thing.

A few days later, Toni Grossi floated a 'Jim Tressel to the Browns' rumor. Now, I hate this rumor. As a fan of both organizations, this is the last thing I want. I can't imagine this is factually based and I see no reason for Tressel to leave OSU.

(Why I don't like it? Glad you asked. If Tressel leaves Columbus, this hurts OSU. They need to find a new coach and there's no way he'll be able to stack up to Tressel. Up in Cleveland, Tressel would take over a sorry franchise that hasn't mattered in about a decade. Could Tressel be a good NFL coach? I would give a solid 'maybe'. Sure, college coaches don't always translate well to the NFL, but hell, Tressel won a national title with Craig Krenzel as his QB. He can do anything. Except win with the Browns. No one can do this. Why tarnish Tressel's good name by moving him 2 hours North. Keep him and his legacy (and his BCS victories) in Columbus where they belong. Let some other poor bastard coach the Browns.)

Bill Livingston weighed in on the Tressel rumor (that his paper started). Not surprisingly, he doesn't think Tressel can do it either. He gives a couple reasons (talent evaluation, discipline and gangsta culture) that I don't particularly get. Don't believe me?

He went with Steve Bellisari in 2001 out of loyalty to a senior, and Bellisari betrayed him on and off the field. He chose Scott McMullen over Craig Krenzel and Justin Zwick over Troy Smith. Zwick was the Maurice Carthon of Ohio State [funny and topical]. He would have pulled Tressel down like an anchor, had Iowa not knocked him out of the lineup in 2004.

Ya, I don't get it either. Tressel screwed up because he signed the top rated high school passer out of high school? So he loses points for going with Zwick and McMullen, but doesn't get props for going with Krenzel and Smith? Oh, I agree Bill, developing Smith into a Heisman QB speaks volumes of Tressel's talent evaluation.

Some wonder about the culture shock of the sweater vest-clad Tressel adrift in the gangsta world of the NFL. But wouldn't his winner's reputation, albeit at a lower level, buy him time?

Nothing screams 'old white sportswriter' than the word 'gangsta'. And Livingston ends the column with this:

When Tressel ludicrously suspended Robert Reynolds for one game for choking Wisconsin quarterback Jim Sorgi in a 2003 game, he said the act was an aberration, out of character for Reynolds. But Reynolds was suspended last week by the Tennessee Titans after he was charged with spousal abuse. His wife spoke of his "violent past."

Titans coach Jeff Fisher, admittedly in a rebuilding year, took a stand for principle over expediency. Tressel talks about doing that, but talk is often all it is.

What's the point here? Should've Tressel suspended him longer? Probably. But why does Jeff Fisher get praise? At this point, Reynolds has stuff in his past; there's more information out there (like the 2003 incident) to judge this current problem. Damn you Jim Tressel, if you had only suspended Reynolds for three games instead of just one in 2003, we wouldn't be in this mess!

Livingston also took issue with Tressel abstaining from voting in the final coaches poll. Of course he did.

Finally, today columnist Bud Shaw suggested the Browns hold on to Romeo... until Bill Cowher becomes available. That's right, Bill Cowher.

At this point are they just suggesting candidates within a 3 hour driving radius? Hmm... I like Marvin Lewis, but that's too far away.

Look, Cowher is obviously a good/great coach. But if he's burned out with coaching the Steelers, why the hell would he come to Cleveland to rebuild? And why would the Browns want him? Also, why would Browns fans want the Steelers coach? I hate the Steelers. Hate 'em, there's no way I would want Cowher here. I've hated him for too long. Too many chin jokes, to many Sgt. Slaughter jokes. Too many times laughing at that Cowher Wal-Mart pic.

I get what Shaw is saying. The Browns should hire a coach with experience. Fine. But the Browns hiring Bill Cowher reminds me of the Dolphins hiring of Jimmy Johnson a few years back. Sure, he's a great coach, but it just didn't seem like he'd be into it. In my opinion, if Cowher came here, it'd mostly be because of a paycheck (especially if he's 'worn out' from Pittsburgh).

Oh, and trust me, I hate to say this, but why in the world would Bill Cowher leave the Steelers to come coach the Browns? Does he feel like the Pittsburgh organization puts too much emphasis on offensive linemen and wants to coach somewhere the O-line is an afterthought? Does he want to opportunity to draft receivers in the second round for 4 years in a row? What could possibly compel him to leave Pittsburgh for the Browns.

Now, which one of those articles do you think a Cleveland fan would enjoy, A baseless LeBron-to-NYC rumor, which we hear enough about from Bill Simmons and Mark Stein, ripping the stars of Ohio State football, even though OSU is the best sports franchise in Ohio, or suggesting that the Browns go after a longtime Steeler icon? Hmm... what'll piss of Clevelanders the most... What the hell is the point here? I know they want to print interesting rumors and get people talking, but come on. Are you just trying to piss of Cleveland fans more?

This is what I look forward to reading every morning. Awesome

And you know what the crazy thing is? None of this involved Roger Brown.