Dinosaurs and Great Moments in History

From Fafblog:

"I dunno if this is gonna work, God," says me.
"Wattayamean, it's not gonna work!" says God. "I'm God! Of course it's gonna work!"
"Well I'm just not sure if you can fit em all," says me. "The brachiosaurs weigh fifty tons each just by themselves an that's not countin the other seven hundred dinosaur species we gotta get on the boat."
"Well of COURSE they're not gonna fit if you bring 'em on full SIZE!" says God. "First you gotta let em dry out so's they shrink back down to their original pill form. THEN, once the flood's over, you take 'em back outta the package, add water, and watch 'em grow!"
"Well," says me. "I GUESS that could work."
"Trust me," says God. "I had like fifty of these things when I was a kid. The first thing you do..."
"RRRAAAAAARRRRRRHHHHH!" says the T-rex chompin God.
"AAAA!" says me runnin away.
"OH GOD!" says God. "So many teeth!"

"An that's why bad things happen to good people," says me.
"Giblets wants ice cream," says Giblets.